A Scrapbook to Celebrate Mom's 80th Birthday

When I decided to celebrate my Mother’s special birthday, there were a few things I had to keep in mind.   We - Mom and I - are dedicated, life-long fans of low-key events. She would not have been comfortable with a large group or an expensive affair. I knew I wanted her day to be tailored to reflect her life and personality and it had to be easy for her friends.

After some thinking time, I suddenly recalled a poem Mom has had on her fridge for years: “Give Me My Roses While I Live” and with that little bit, everything else fell in place. I would give her “roses” but in a special form. Her “roses” would be letters from all her friends and family and each letter would be placed on its own scrapbook page.

I wrote to everyone who is important to my Mother and explained what I was planning, asking them to write a letter for the book, recalling some humorous moment or tough times or a trip, whatever they wanted.  I included a self-addressed, stamped envelope to make it easier for these older folks, and to encourage them to respond.  After all, no letters-no scrapbook.

As soon as I mailed the letters, I called them to explain what I was planning and to let them know they could expect my letter in a few days. This also gave them a chance to ask any questions and be re-assured that whatever they wrote would be valuable.  

Soon their letters started arriving.  I bought a scrapbook, feeling lucky to find one with roses on the cover.  I typed out the poem and pasted that on the first page, along with little decorative items I purchased when I bought the scrapbook. I next pasted each letter on its page, decorating each individually. I was delighted to see how quickly the book was taking shape.

Next came the party.  We now had a very personal, special gift and everyone my Mother cared about had contributed some vignette of decades-long friendships. Next, I planned an informal open house at Mom’s and asked each person to bring a single rose.  Her grandchildren were all there to help with greeting, serving and fetching whatever was needed.

It was so amazing when those very elderly people started knocking on the door, holding a single rose!  The scrapbook they had all created was passed around, memories were revived and laughter filled my Mom’s small living room.  By the time they had all come and gone, Mom’s kitchen table was covered in fresh flowers and she was delighted with her day.  It didn’t cost anyone much; no one had to get dressed up or sit through a formal planned event, feeling uncomfortable. It wasn’t expensive and yet it was priceless.

I do think this could be adapted many ways to suit almost any age or interest. It starts with one central theme.  For those who love crafts or gardening, ask each person to bring a small, related item such as garden gloves, pots or plant stakes. For crafters it could be specialty scissors, a tube of paint or brush.

It really can be much more fun if you limit gifts to $5 or so. The idea is to honor a person, not create a splashy event.  Better to stretch the imagination than the budget.  All the over the top stuff has already been done anyway.  Make it meaningful, not expensive.